INTERPERSONAL COMMUNICATION

INTRODUCTION

Long before cave drawings and the first traces of writing, humans communicated their knowledge, skills, experiences, fears, joys, and aspirations. Through their work, shaping the raw materials at their disposal and organizing the spaces in which they lived and reproduced, they had to convey not only techniques and gestures but also traditions, attitudes, emotions, and feelings.

The drawings depicting, on the one hand, hunting sequences or social ceremonies and, on the other hand, tools—ranging from chipped stone tools to weapons, utensils, jewelry, and objects found in graves—attest not only to the existence of human communities but also to their desire to ensure their continuity in the future memory of their peers and to guarantee a non-verbal protection of the transmission of their ways of life, social organization, and values. The history of humanity was preserved with them and transmitted through what distinguished it from others.

The pyramids of Egypt or America, just like the mausoleums of Lenin or Mao, are there to attest to and communicate beyond the survival of any language, written or spoken, the particular status of a person, an era, or a political choice. Communication thus served to preserve the species and protect it, to proclaim and perpetuate superiorities, and ultimately to satisfy passions, liberate imaginations, or alienate them.

The decision to communicate information, to suspend its dissemination, or to distribute it selectively is the classic example used to illustrate the powers of communication. Moreover, the choice of a specific language, linguistic register, medium, or form of expression instead of other available alternatives is another example of these powers. Indeed, each of these variables has the potential to influence behaviors and affect the attitudes and beliefs of individuals and groups.

Communication is a necessity for everyone at all levels of authority. Furthermore, the practice of communication requires arrangements, organizations, and precision in defining its objectives, forms, and allocations. Given the growing interest in communication within the framework of human and socio-professional relations, it is essential to reflect on the techniques and methods to be implemented to succeed in this act.

Communication is imperative for anyone engaging in relationships involving the exercise of power or submission to its authority. Mastering its complex process requires both physical and psychological availability from the communicating parties. However, it can be subject to distortions if a set of attitudes and skills are not adopted or acquired.

I - THE BASIC PROCESS OF COMMUNICATION

Correct interpersonal communication between individuals occurs only if the ideas, facts, attitudes, or feelings that the sender seeks to convey are well understood and interpreted by the receiver. Internal as well as external factors often lead individuals to inaccurate perceptions and poor-quality interpersonal communication.

11 - The Sender and the Receiver
Interpersonal communication obviously requires two or more people. Given that it often involves numerous exchanges between the concerned individuals, it is arbitrary to say that one person is the sender and another the receiver. They constantly exchange their roles; it all depends on the position occupied by each at a moment in the process.

The goals of the sender and the receiver significantly influence the communication process. For example, the sender may seek to achieve certain goals through communication; this may involve completing or changing the ideas, attitudes, or behaviors of the receiver, or altering their relationship with that person. If the receiver disagrees with the intended goal, distortions and misunderstandings are likely to occur during communication; the smaller the differences between the interlocutors regarding their goals, attitudes, and values, the greater the likelihood of successful communication.

12 - Transmitters and Receivers
The terms transmitters and receivers refer to the means available to those who wish to send and receive messages. In interpersonal communication, these terms generally involve the use of our senses: sight, hearing, smell, touch, and taste. Transmission can therefore involve verbal and non-verbal means. Once it begins, the communication process escapes the absolute control of the sender. A message that has been transmitted cannot be retracted. How many times have we thought to ourselves: "I regret saying that"?

13 - Messages, Transmission Channels, and Noise
Messages include the transmitted data and the coded symbols meant to ascribe specific meanings to that data. The sender always hopes that the messages will be interpreted in the way they intended. To understand the difference between the original meaning and the received message, let us recall a moment when we tried to communicate our innermost thoughts and feelings of love, rage, or fear to a third party. Did we not think that it was difficult or almost impossible to convey the deep meaning of our message? The greater the difference between the original message and the interpretation given to it, the more defective interpersonal communication becomes. For communication to occur, the sender and receiver must have something in common. Words and non-verbal symbols do not have inherent meanings; their significance is created by both the sender and the receiver.

Channels are the means by which the sender's messages reach the receiver. For example, a dialogue can be carried by the atmosphere during a conversation between people present or through a telephone line. Noise is anything that creates interference with the message as it is transmitted through the channel. A radio broadcasting loud music while someone is trying to speak to another person is an example of noise. To overcome it, one should repeat the message or increase its intensity.

14 - Meaning, Encoding, and Decoding

The sender's message is transmitted to the receiver's senses through channels. The symbolic form of the received messages is transformed into a form that conveys meaning. Meanings correspond to a person's ideas, values, attitudes, and feelings, as well as the situations they find themselves in.

Encoding allows for the translation of meanings into messages suitable for sending. Vocabulary and knowledge play a significant role in the sender's encoding capability. Professionals often struggle to communicate with the general public because they tend to encode meanings in a form that can only be understood by other professionals in the same field. For example, contracts directly affecting consumers are often written in such a way that only legal experts can encode and decode them.

Decoding is the translation of received messages into interpreted meanings. By using a common language, individuals can decode numerous messages so that the received meanings are as close as possible to the transmitted meanings. If one has tried to communicate in French with someone who only speaks English or German, one already knows how important it is to have a common language for encoding messages.

Thus, the quality of interpersonal communication is assessed by comparing it to an ideal state. An ideal state exists when the meanings intended by the sender and their interpretation by the receiver are identical. However, for communication to be effective, certain conditions must necessarily exist.

II - Conditions for Communication

The willingness to communicate is the first condition for coherent, meaningful, and efficient exchange. In other words, for the communication process to occur normally, the potential co-actors must be available to one another. Indeed, any distraction from one party is a cause for a breakdown in the process or a reduction of its potential. The availability in question mainly concerns two forms: physical availability and psychological availability.

21 - Physical Availability

This includes the necessity of a recognizable vehicle that is available to both parties and optimal conditions for its functioning. In the simplest and perhaps most common case, that of verbal exchange face-to-face, the physical vehicle is language or sign language for the hearing-impaired. Optimal conditions are mutual mastery of these languages and the ability to perceive, record, and interpret their signs. A blind person cannot, for example, converse with a hearing-impaired person using sign language because they cannot see the gestures of their interlocutor. The hearing-impaired person can, on the other hand, see the gestures of the blind person, provided the latter has learned this language, but cannot respond, leading to a lack of communication between them.

Moreover, a message from which a number of signals are lost or affected during transmission loses its value and immunity and risks being contaminated. Furthermore, contamination of a message can occur due to differences in semantic references, emotional and affective charges of the various verbal and non-verbal components of the co-actors’ language.

The quality of the environment in which communication takes place greatly affects it. A cold, poorly lit classroom that echoes the voice of a teacher and the noise of a malfunctioning toilet will motivate students less than a more comfortable room where concentration on the teacher and their discourse is favored by the absence of any distraction.

22 - Psychological Availability

This refers to a person’s relative or absolute willingness to engage with others or with another person specifically. It is relative because it can be momentary or permanent, concern a specific subject, or express a total refusal of any interaction. In all cases, psychological availability influences attitudes, the initial appreciation that determines the impression one forms of others, and thus the outcome of the entire communication process. It is therefore important to schedule communication to occur during moments of optimal psychological availability.

Similarly, psychological availability is influenced by a number of factors, some related to the communicator themselves, to the anticipation of the co-actors, and their verbal and non-verbal reactions. Others relate to the languages used, the nature of the message, and the various stakes associated with it. A speaker whose voice is unpleasant for some reason or whose appearance does not associate them with a profile anticipated by co-actors, or whose age does not confer, in their minds, the respect and authority necessary to speak on a given subject, is a speaker who will not be listened to, and whose message will be received with much apprehension and uncertainty.

It is therefore necessary to conceive of communication as a complex process involving co-actors, their cognitive and affective histories, their value systems, as well as the goals, structure, and opportunity of the message.

23 - Communication as a Continuum

The process of communication is thus a continuum within which acts are inscribed and situations anchored, bringing into contact individuals whose nature and degree of relationships are variable, evolving, and mutually influencing. Indeed, the objectives and/or interests that bring co-actors into contact do not necessarily arise at the moment of this initial encounter. Each individual likely has an individual experience and a specific history with their interests, the pursuit of their satisfaction, and efforts to derive the most advantages while defending against the abuses, disadvantages, and harm associated with them. Moreover, each party has developed a personal method for approaching these interests: a specific language to discuss them, a unique logic to analyze them, and a particular strategy to advocate for them.

The first contact between two co-actors in a communication process is never truly the first, or it is only the first to the extent that it is the first meeting of two individuals who have always sought to satisfy complementary, similar, or conflicting needs. Similarly, the separation of two co-actors or the exit of one from a communication act does not necessarily break the process or end the interests that brought them into contact, nor the exchange of messages that occurred during their encounter.

In fact, participation in a communication act begins even before the physical and direct contact of the co-actors and continues long after their separation. For example, participants know the theme and agenda of a conference several days before the meeting date, which activates and mobilizes them intellectually and emotionally around a debate that has yet to occur; the audience thus develops structures of anticipation of evaluative systems, prepares questions, and even responses to questions that have not yet been posed. Speakers are scrutinized even before they present themselves at the conference hall. Often, there are complaints from frustrated listeners about the absence of a speaker to whom they had prepared not just questions but comments and criticisms. After a presentation and the debates it has sparked in the conference hall, discussions often follow in newspapers or specialized publications.

Moreover, the conclusions of scholarly presentations and scientific articles are often openings for future debates, anticipations, or recommendations for action. In all cases, the conclusion represents participation in a debate that has not yet started and whose theoretical foundations may not have even been imagined yet. The communication process thus does not stop at the conclusion of a given act; it continues and translates into other communication opportunities, in other media, with other audiences, or even other objectives.

Furthermore, since communication acts are essentially re-enactments of other acts that co-actors or all co-actors have not initiated or to which they have not previously participated, they are then based on positions, attitudes, and analyses recalling other individuals who influenced the communicative course and who may no longer be present. This is how the influence of individuals or groups who are no longer present can weigh on negotiations.

Similarly, the strength of character, credibility, charisma, and other assets required by an individual during a communication act can be borrowed. Indeed, a person addressing an audience that does not know them may invest, at least in part, the charismatic or mobilizing characteristics of another individual known to that audience and link themselves through complicities that they had with the other individual. The reference person can be real or not, mythical or fictitious. In some cases, they may not even be personally known to the audience. This is the case of a speaker who references the image of a father, a spiritual leader, or another symbolic image in which the audience recognizes themselves. Quoting a verse from the Quran, referencing the hero of a novel, a television series, a liberation war, a social or political organization, or a historical period of a given group are all ways to borrow characteristics that can motivate an audience and invest in communicating with it. The identification of the audience with these symbolic figures and their attitudes toward them becomes means of transfer between co-actors.

24 - Reasoning, Logic, and Persuasion

What is important in a communication process, therefore, is not the intrinsic logic but its perception by the various partners. It is not merely about expressing logic but convincing the co-actors of it. Indeed, an important criterion for measuring the quality of an argument is the influence it manages to exert on the targeted co-actors; it is its ability to communicate this logic to them, and not the logic itself that determines their adherence to the message.

The quality of any communication act depends on the extent of mastery over the subject of the exchanges. The more intense the personal experience, the more effective and convincing the communication will be.

Basing arguments on precise, tangible, and quantified facts enhances the persuasive value. Statistics, for example, give a message more credibility than general expressions of the importance or magnitude of a given incidence.

Attitudes and opinions are more influenced by narratives that report examples of behaviors and specific cases that illustrate arguments through detailed descriptions.

While describing a process expressed as an assertion does not in itself constitute an argument, it contributes to making one if associated with another to validate, assess, or support it. In other words, it is the relationship of a description to another part of the discourse that determines its function and relevance in the reasoning process.

III - SUCCEEDING IN COMMUNICATION

The predisposition to effective communication is characterized by a set of attitudes and skills that, when lacking in a person, penalize them; however, these attitudes can be learned and acquired.

31 - Characteristics of a Good Communicator

A good communicator is one who masters the temptation to impose their opinions, directs conversations, and controls their evolution. Indeed, a message directed at a person or a group of people with the intention perceived as wanting to control their behaviors will have much less effect than if those same people feel involved in the discussion or in an intellectual effort of analysis or evaluation. Thus, the tendency to withdraw and adopt defensive attitudes is more prevalent when faced with direct speeches and attempts to manipulate behavior than when facing discussions or problem-solving efforts. Similarly, the reaction characterized by indifference and disinterest is typical of a co-actor who perceives arrogance, distance, coldness, dogmatism, and a lack of humility in a communicative act that seeks to influence them but fails to show them interest and solicitude.

Anyone engaging in a communication process must develop the ability to listen to co-actors and give them the opportunity to express their opinions, frustrations, and desires, even when they deviate from the main objectives of the ongoing communication act.

32 - Rules for Effective Communication

The most important factor is the recipient of the message. Indeed, one can be the most decorated sender; if the other does not understand us, communication does not exist. Likewise, our message can be profound, but if the other does not understand it, it’s as if we said nothing at all—worse still, because in the future, the other might not listen to us again. However, if we make an effort, as senders, to reach the recipient by adapting our message to their capacity for understanding, we will be understood, and communication will occur.

The speaker must be competent. They must reflect on what they will say before the meeting in order to address the issue with clarity, placing it in its context and in relation to the objectives of the meeting. But content competence is insufficient if one is also not competent in how to transmit a message clearly and simply, and if they do not know the elements to implement in any relationship with others.

It is always possible to explain complicated problems clearly. A message will be easier to convey clearly the more competent the facilitator is on the subject, having studied and mastered it. Those who use jargon often camouflage their incompetence in communication or even their content knowledge.

33 - Feedback

For the adjustment between the sender's intention and the recipient's expectations to be realized, and for the decoding of the used signs to be relevant, communication feedback from the recipient will be necessary. Initially, this recurrent communication, or "feedback," was used in the military during radio communications by troops in operations. The receiving technician reformulated the message they had just recorded, allowing for immediate correction of transmission errors.

However, in human relationships, when we speak of feedback, it does not mean that the recipient plays the role of a mere echo that mechanically repeats the initial message. True feedback only occurs when the recipient can integrate the other person's message to the point of being able to re-express, without distortion, both the content and the feelings it implies, which are not always explicit from the sender.

This requires a significant level of availability and maximum attention to all verbal and non-verbal signs. It also demands time, whereas we are often in a rush, reluctant to spend precious minutes on verifications that do not seem useful. Yet, if after a few moments of discussion, we realize that our interlocutor and we are on two parallel or even opposing paths, while initially, we thought we were on the same road, what a waste of time to go back, hoping to locate the point where we diverged!

Reexpression can be used permanently, but it should not be blind or systematic; it is not about repeating every sentence but focusing on those that mark significant stages in the dialogue of the two interlocutors. This helps avoid misunderstandings and energy wastage. Whenever the topic of exchange is truly engaging for the partners, the passion they may invest often prevents them from truly listening; they prepare their arguments and replies instead of following the shared thought. It is in these moments that reexpression would be most useful, although it is often when we think least about using it.

We struggle to realize that using feedback, the return of communication, does not imply that we approve of what has just been said, but rather that we accept the "said" from the other, recognizing their right to have a personal thought that is autonomous from ours. By accepting to reexpress what they have just shared with us, we give them the opportunity to better feel their thoughts and clarify their ideas. Hearing their message reflected in this way allows the sender to view it more objectively and advance in their reflection process.

Thus, feedback reaches its fullness, realizing its purpose when it allows both interlocutors to move forward together, to progress, to continually surpass each moment of their encounter. Reexpression finds its meaning when it facilitates this progress, especially when it becomes more laborious, when certain obstacles arise on the shared path. The development of communication in a conversation thus calls for the personal and successive contributions of each participant, a continuous and original renewal of the exchange; otherwise, communication would cease, disintegrate due to a lack of "nourishment," from an absence of sustenance.

34 - The Ability to Express Oneself

The ability to communicate orally has long been seen as the domain of politicians, as opposed to the ability to read and write serious documents traditionally associated with the typical administrator. However, there is a growing realization that the image of a responsible individual sitting behind a desk piled with paperwork no longer meets the demands of the time.

To succeed, the modern leader must borrow a little from the politician: they must learn to motivate their collaborators by exchanging ideas with them, persuading them to follow. They must know how to communicate effectively.

Among true communicators, three fundamental characteristics can be observed: the desire to express oneself, magnetism, and spontaneity.

• The Desire to Express Oneself:
  To engage an audience, it is essential to be genuinely interested in what one does. The communicator's attitude towards the subject is extremely contagious. Of course, it is not enough to talk about something that excites us to capture others' attention; we must engage with them, reach them—this is the key difference between listening to oneself and being heard. To be heard, it is essential to address the needs of the audience, to establish an informal connection, from person to person; without this relationship, no message is transmitted.

• Magnetism:
  It is very important, to establish good communication, to "pass the ramp," meaning to exude enough magnetism for messages to be received and retained. It is acknowledged that eighty percent of communication is non-verbal. This means we must decode and understand much more from the speaker’s attitude expressed through their words. Speaking without theatrical expression and trying to be understood only through intellect is a grave mistake. What matters most is that the person externalizes what they feel and demonstrates a certain dramatic intensity. This is where magnetism comes into play.

• Spontaneity:
  The power of verbal communication compared to other forms of exchange comes from the potential for gradual adjustment between the sender and the receiver. Good communicators possess a quick wit; they are fully present in the communication and respond rapidly. Their persuasive power stems much more from their spontaneity than from the accuracy or depth of their responses. In interactive situations, a short and simple on-the-spot response is preferable to a detailed exposition presented the following day. An individual who takes time to provide documented answers is out of sync and loses a lot of effectiveness.

CONCLUSION

Communication is a continuous process of mutual influence, but generally unequal, due to disparities in social, economic, cultural, interpersonal, and institutional status. Mastering communication is not simply about mastering its techniques, nor is it achieved solely through academic exercises of its methods; rather, it involves total and sustained engagement in human relationships at both the individual and institutional levels, as well as awareness of the ideological and historical significance of these relationships. In other words, mastering communication requires knowledge of humanity, its fundamental motivations, essential needs, preferences, individual experiences, and intellectual, cognitive, and affective abilities.